Sahara--Secret Agent 006
by Jack Corbett
Who is agent 006? Is she the waitress who used to serve the girl who became the main female character of my novel, Lori Mellon, and me drinks while we misbehaved in the club's hot tub? My old confident I used to unload on close to eight years ago? Is she the stripper from Hustler Club or the actress playing the Canadian secret agent in our videos? Or is she the frugal woman living in a small town who is working three jobs at once?
Catch her at home or out with friends at a pub and you will find her wearing loose fitting clothes that betray nothing of what lies underneath. If she likes you chances are she might buy you a beer before you even think about getting her one.
Not dancer material. Doesn't even look like one. She works as a cook for large numbers of people and often bartends when she's not doing that along with her good friend Lori, the World's Best Bartender, or at least I call her that. Well...secret agent 006 is a damn good bartender and a great waitress too but we are still going to call Lori World's Best Bartender since we got something else in mind to call Secret Agent 006. So you are just going to have to read up before I get to the punch line on this one.
I had been going to Visions for years. First it was the Paradise Club, then Platinum Club bought it and renamed it Platinum II or Paradise Platinum Show Club. I had countless adventures and misadventures there no matter who owned the club and the best part of it was this club never barred me and I sure pulled off some wild ones there. And Secret Agent 006 had been around me during some of my best and worse escapades.
Like that time Lori Mellon and I were drunk and I pulled off my swimming trunks in the hot tub the club used to have. The club got us on video too. I was so bombed I tried to put both my legs into one leg of those shorts and just couldn't seem to get my whole body into that small opening. Then I put the shorts on backwards before parading in front of the whole club on my way back to the men's room. It was Secret Agent 006, our waitress who came up to Lori Mellon (not Lori the World's Best Bartender) and me at our table telling me---"The manager wants to see you, Jack, in her office." When I went in to see what the manager wanted I was told...."We got you on video, Jack and you and Lori Mellon were doing some things you shouldn't have been doing....like your taking your shorts off in our hot tub." I told the manager how sorry I was (Sorry to have gotten caught that is) and went back into the room to join Lori Mellon for still another drink. Five minutes later Secret Agent 006 had to tell Lori to see the manager. Luckily Lori Mellon wasn't fired on the spot and I wasn't barred for doing what we had been doing together in that hot tub.
I had gotten used to Secret Agent 006 being just a waitress and a bartender. I lusted after Lori Mellon and some of the other dancers. Then I stopped going to Visions for months. Got really involved at Dollies Playhoude where the club supplied me with a phone line, cheap drinks and my own table where I could get online with my laptop whenever I wanted to go online. Dollies used to be really something in those days and I ended up taking well over 1500 pictures with my digital camera in this club alone that proves it.
Most of the time I'd be at Dollies. The rest of the time I'd go to a couple other clubs close by. Then I had a little parting of the ways with the new Dollies General Manager and ended up being asked to do some articles for a local magazine that covers among other things the strip club action in several states.
Which club would I cover first? That one was a no brainer. Had to be Visions where I had so many good times in the past and where I knew two excellent managers, Charles and Charlie (she's a girl). So I went in. Our last woman of the month was there. Didn't know her from Adam but I had too many beers and wound up waking up the next morning wondering who Selena was who had given me thirty free passes with her name on them. But before I had all those beers I saw her.
They had some pretty girls there that night, Selena being one of them. But as I sat at that bar I saw a woman flit by who had a figure that just wouldn't quit. Immediately I thought..."That one's a ringer. Where did they get her from?" Trim in the waist with shoulders and arms that appeared to have been made from a sculpture's hand not to mention having the most gorgeous legs this girl also just happened to be wearing an outfit that cried out..."Look at me."
Guess who that was? It took awhile for me to get it together. It was the waitress...Agent 006, now dancing under the stage name Sahara. A half hour after recovering from my shock of discovering that the femme fatale was my old waitress I found her sitting at a little table, joined her, and bought her a drink. She hadn't changed. She was the same woman I had known before. Just as easy to talk with. Had the same smile I had grown to like. And she remembered so many things the liquor had made me forget...things that had happened years ago.
Then I watched her dance and once again I couldn't believe my eyes. She was terrific. One of the best dancers in the Metro East. I asked her what had gotten into her and it was then that she told me about the kick boxing. No wonder her muscles were so well toned. Told me she had recently quit the martial arts after breaking a guy's ribs. She felt badly about that one, she said to me, and I believed her. After all, she had been my waitress for years and I had always found her sincerity to be compelling.
Then something happened. Visions fired all the girls since the club was renaming itself, "Boxers and Briefs" and would soon feature male dancers. No longer any need for a cute shapely bartender like Lori (Lori the World's Best Bartender---not Lori Mellon) or for terrific looking female dancers like Sahara.
They say a picture is worth a thousand words and I have a whole lot more to say about Agent 006, Sahara, and I won't even mention her real name here I'll just have to get on with the rest after you have the chance to drink in her pictures. Just remember to click on the thumbnails to get the full size pictures.
That was a great photo shoot we did and we didn't stop until we got 146 pictures and that doesn't count the ones we did that last night Visions had female dancers. So trust me.....we will soon have a lot more pictures of Sahara to show at the new Dance Wear web site which will be linked here but first...there's a lot more I have to say for her.
She didn't dance again for months. I had become good friends with Lori who had started bartending in non topless bars now that Boxers and Briefs no longer had a need for pretty long legged women. And Secret Agent 006 just happened to live two doors down from Lori. Once again I got to see my ex waitress who became the femme fatale back in a non femme fatale light. In those baggy clothes that offered little hint of the ravishing figure that lurked beneath.
Like Lori she becomes one of my drinking companions. Lori's husband Ron, the guy who lives upstairs, Rocker, Lori, and Sahara form the nucleus of a little group doing videos with me, most of them comedies. And Sahara no longer is Sahara, the dancer. She becomes in my mind's eye just a girl...a girl with a common next door type of gal's real name. Generous but vulnerable. Not a dancer at all but someone who works hard, comes home often tired in the evening, yet still remains so huggable. Cute no matter what she's wearing.
Then I start to do the Dance Wear Web site for Steve and we need a model to show off the outfits Steve and his wife make and sell. And Secret Agent 006 is to be the model...the girl Steve wants above all others. The first on the Dance Wear site. So we schedule the photo shoot. I pick Sahara up at her place and drive her to my apartment where I have one of the bedrooms lined out with mirrors and a black background on the other wall. Steve joins us soon after we arrive. We spend ten hours doing the photo shoot, driving to the shoot and back to Sahara's place, and going over the pictures together...Steve, Sahara, and me having a late dinner at Applebees as one of the waitresses sees the images appearing on my laptop and comes over to get a much closer look as she tells Sahara how terrific she looked.
And terrific she was. During that shoot she was no longer the girl next door type wearing the baggy clothes. Alluring and sexy as she changed from one outfit to another she once again surprised me as I saw her once again in a different light.
Then the irony of all ironies happened. Selena who was the alphapro woman of the month who had worked with both Lori and Sahara at Visions and who had not danced for eight months who was soon to be replaced by Sahara paid us all a visit. She danced one night at the Crystal Palace. After not dancing since Visions gave up on female dancers Sahara came out of retirement to join her old friend. Once again I saw still another side of Sahara when she proved what a true friend she can be and this time she proved how she'd stand by Selena.
Sahara is still dancing at the Crystal Palace and I have to say I recommend the place. How fitting that Sahara would follow her good friend as the Alphapro woman of the month while Selena's write up and pictures join Lori's in the Hall of Fame.
Which brings us to the "It Girl". Back in the days of the old silent films an actress named Clara Bow became glamorized as the "It Girl". That is she had "It"...a certain hard to define sensuality and looks that brought her many male admirers in the early 1900's. Well--if they could have an "It girl" back that long ago why can't we have our "It girl" here at Alphapro? On Saturday January 29th here at Jack's Hangover Haven we are having a party to celebrate Alex our 1998's Dancer of the Year's Retirement and to spearhead our 1999's awards when we will crown a new dancer of the year as we give out twelve other awards. One of these awards will be for 1999's bartender of the year. I never thought anyone could ever match Dina as a bartender who should be at the party. She was in a class of her own. Until now. I'm going to push hard for Lori to win the 1999 award for bartender of the year when she will meet Dina, the two women without peer. The "It Girl"? I'm going for Sahara, otherwise known as Secret Agent 006. She's so squeezable, so appealing, so sensual, so nice and I like holding her hand. Someone out there make me shut up.
Don't worry. She's in it.
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